The day in the office has been an eventful one. Yesterday I got a real short pixie cut and it gave me quite some attention in my office.
To all those people, who think that I have done this to gain attention and usually women do such stuff to gain attention, let me disillusion you. I did not. In fact I do not crave for attention from random people in public spaces and I become very uncomfortable when I get too much of it.
The comments in the office and on Facebook ranged from looking good to looking like a boy and even pointing a question on my sanity. While I definitely enjoyed all the comments from people who found me pretty in my new hair cut, the comments that I am looking like a boy or I am looking frightening (Yes! one of my colleagues even said that my haircut is frightening! So much for professional conduct in the office!) was upsetting.
To tell you the truth, I am a little jaded from being bombarded with judgments continuously through out the day. My body is my own and I do not like to be judged on its basis. Furthermore, I find passing judgments on physical features indecent and demeaning to an individual.
More than facebook, I am tired with the office experience. Facebook is a virtual world which I can shut off at my own will, but in real world I can not do any of that. Many of my colleagues didn’t say a single thing on my look and I am thankful to them for keeping it that way. But then I realized, I heard all the comments in office from people with whom I interact and talk on non-office topics or play foosball. I can not help but wonder should I have always put on a facade of professionalism and kept a distance from all the people around me in my office to save myself from all these comments?
But having said so, I occasionally do compliment friends. Mostly I do it when I am in a terrific mood and find everything around me beautiful. And as I mentioned earlier, I too like being complimented. Be it on the code that I have written or the cake that I have baked or the way that I have looked. This too falls in the category of passing a judgement. Then isn’t this whole concept of beauty a cruel thing to control human emotion? Err… it sounds too grand and conspiratorial and I try to stay away from any such extremist views. But I guess what I want is a society without any act of microaggresion. Unfortunately, at the present state of the society that I live in, it is too much to ask for. And I feel sad about it.
However, I should mention one of my friends here. He too initially commented that I was looking like a boy. But after a small discussion he saw my point and took back his comment. That was a nice gesture. World is not too bad a place to live I guess!
Here’s a nice relevant line taken from here –